When Shemp thought the IRS was going to take everything, he began to run this ad in the local sleay tabloids hoping to make a quick buck.

		The "Wackiest" collection of my very own "Top-Kwality®" brand novelty items, direct from my garage to you!
	Try the Mix & Match special. Any 5 items or more and you pay only 1.99¢ each
	Dog Mess Bad dog! Should have let him out. Looks real because it IS real. Straight from my backyard and my neighbor's Great Dane. ITEM 29009 $3.55
	Non-Disappearing Ink They'll think you've just stained their best shirt with joke ink that vanishes in minutes. The jokes on them! It's real and it won't wash out. ITEM 24567 $3.99
	Hernia Kit Looks and feels like the real thing! Breaks the ice at parties and really attracts the chicks. Ouch, that looks like it hurts. ITEM 38891 $4.99
			Phony Parking Tickets Leave it on a car or bike of someone who just can't park right. Looks just like the real thing only it has YOUR address on it. They'll pay the fine directly to you. (May not be legal in some states) ITEM 74685 $4.99
	Dirty Soap Put it in your bathroom for the guests to use. Turns their face and hands black. Never wears off because it's made of an industrial grade varnish. ITEM 33411 $1.35
	Tick Eggs Straight from our deers to you. Infest your friends. ITEM 23885 $1.77
	Wacky Candles "Victim" blows them out, and they explode. (TNT not included) ITEM 55534 (pkg. of 10) $1.59